Being a new first-time mum is hard. Being a new first-time mum doing it alone is a whole different level (I've had it confirmed by numerous co-parenting couples). Trying to do everything by the book whilst under the ever watchful eye of everyone, or at least that's how it feels. Absolutely exhausted yet having to continuously deal with internal conflict and anxiety. As well as having to listen to the hundred thousand dollar (or pound) question; that plays on a loop repeatedly in my mind, am I doing it right?
Miracles really do happen!
For as long as I can remember, I had always wanted to be a mother. To carry my baby for nine months, give birth, love him or her unconditionally and live happily ever after. Unfortunately, it didn't happen quite that easily for me. I was told and believed for many years that I was unable to conceive. This heartbreaking news was delivered to me after three miscarriages and two ectopic pregnancies. One of the ectopic pregnancies resulted in having to have one of my fallopian tubes removed. After lots of tears and heartache, I reluctantly accepted that I would never achieve my dream of becoming a mother. I picked myself up and carried on with my life the best I could although the longing for a child never left me.
Skip forward eight years and hooray, my dream came true! I was pregnant! The medical professionals were wrong, mother nature had done her stuff and the little blue cross on the pregnancy test was there for all to see. My initial sheer joy was soon swallowed up by complete and utter panic, this was instigated by the fact that my baby daddy upped and left and consequently never looked back! I must admit that being pregnant and alone was not how I had imagined my pregnancy would go, however my unborn child was my main concern, so once again I picked myself ready to fully embrace my life as a single parent.